RyanGarns.com 
Remarks from an unremarkable man. Original satire and humorous commentary on politics, pop culture and current events. Updated weekly.
Latest Content
Angry Blog Comments: A Literal Response - 13 days ago
One of the pitfalls of writing comedy, apart from attracting copious numbers of women whose hearts must be toyed with to keep them at bay, is that occasionally I'll get readers who simply don't understand irony. A case in point: a piece I...
Billy Mays for Waterboarding - 25 days ago
Hi! Billy Mays here! Are you tired of Muslim extremists threatening your freedom? Do you wish there was an easy way of extracting information from these fanatics about their next terrorist attack? Well, now there is! It's an exciting new...
Keith Olbermann Rant Generator - 39 days ago
Did you miss Keith Olbermann's latest tirade on "Countdown"? If MSNBC's feeble ratings are any indication, you're not alone. Never fear! Just read the following Olbermann Rant Template TM , customize the content where applicable,...
Cat Blogger Says Twitter is Beneath Her - 48 days ago
The Command Center of "The Mittens Chronicles". Lorem Ipsum, author of the cat blog "The Mittens Chronicles", has announced that she will not be joining online juggernaut Twitter due to what she calls the social media site's..
Perez Hilton to Vet Supreme Court Pick - 55 days ago
President Obama is under pressure from gay activist groups to select a homosexual to replace the retiring Supreme Court Justice David Souter. While as of this writing it's uncertain if Obama will heed this request, one decision has already been...





























